I just want to thank the creators of Facebook and Instagram for allowing me to capture this rare moment of mommysuperdom and give the impression to the world that I not only teach my children valuable lessons in growing your own organic food but I can also hold my breath and flex my muscles with every ounce of strength I've got while smiling. I mean seriously people this looks too good to be true because it is. So yeah, we did plant a garden. And really I use the term 'we' loosely. I forced the kids to help for about 5 minutes. Apparently the sun was too hot and the weeds were too prickly and they were dehydrated immediately. So I said what every loving mom who is trying to teach her kiddos a valuable lesson would say, "Swallow your spit." But then the complaining got to be louder than my awesome Foster the People Pandora station so I sent them off to help Levi with the flowerbed in the front. You're welcome Handsome.
Do you see all those weeds?! That is how the entire garden looked...absolutely covered! And Jack and Addie's beach toys were no help so I spent about 2 hours pulling every teeny sign of life out of that dirt...except for the worms. I kept the worms.
Now I actually am going to take some awesome mommy credit right here...get ready. I have officially developed my own gardening program. I may actually try to patent this and finally buy that island because it is brilliant! But let me explain how I came about this genius plan.
First of all you should know I do a garden almost every year. I have NEVER gotten more than nine things out of it that we could eat. I have aloe vera in my window that is dying! How does a cactus die?!?!? I am just that terrible at growing things. Luckily my kids are vocal enough to demand water but it frightens me to think about the alternative...would I ever get them water otherwise? Surely I would...not that it matters because they have legs, they can get their own water. And bring me a glass too...with lemon.
Okay, so I'm bad at gardening. And I don't know if you know this but it is expensive. Especially when nothing grows and you still have to buy food. And I've always bought the plants...not the seeds because they just look so hopeful and I feel so good about myself when I check out at Lowes and everyone sees that I am going to be growing like thirty-three kinds of tomatoes. But every year I try again. Last year I said no more and we just bought a packet of those giant Sunflower seeds on a whim and I let the kids sprinkle them in the garden. AND GUESS WHAT?! Those babies took off! I had the prettiest sunflowers ever...although freakishly tall. I mean really, it was kinda scary.
So it got me thinking...which
Then my Mimi, who is this master gardener (its a real thing, like being a black belt in gardening) said she read an article about this woman taking all her seeds from the previous year and just scattering them all around one of her beds and seeing what grows.
And that settled it! We were growing a garden but this time we were going to use seeds! So we headed to Lowes and we bought every kind of seed packet they had. We also bought 5 tomato plants and some basil because I wanted that special feeling at checkout.
Now I know there are instructions on how to plant seeds. I can read. I saw that they needed to be spaced 12 to 36 inches apart. But I didn't have time, patience, or space for that. So after I...just me, no help, from my kids, at all...finished pulling all those weeds and adding some soil mix (which I lifted all by myself because I'm crossfitty) and vermiculite (I have no idea what this is...my Mimi told me to do it) it was time to plant! I called the kids back now that the hard work was over and let them pick their seeds and pretty much put them wherever and however they wanted. I have officially named our garden "The Come What May Garden." I don't know why I have to name everything...I just do.
After it was all said and done I felt accomplished and I had managed to teach my children some valuable lessons about what our fruits and vegetables start from and photosynthesis and how when you squeeze an earthworm all the poop comes out. And apparently I've inspired Addie to grow her own garden in my Pyrex. Crazy thing is two days later and those flowers are still alive and bloomed. I'm really thinking she might have gotten my Mimi's green thumb...which will come in handy during the Zombie Apocalypse.
So I'm gonna wait before I bust out the "How to Grow a Come What May Garden" book just to be sure that something actually grows. Listen, there is so much stuff in that garden it is gonna be more like a "Survival of the Fittest Garden" and whatever plant is the strongest will survive. Which is way cool. I'll keep you posted on how it grows...see what I did right there, grows instead of goes...get it??? Don't stop reading my blog...I'll be cooler. I promise.
By the time all the gardening work was done it was way past dinner time. So we made Kitchen Sink Bowls. Basically we just throw everything but the kitchen sink into a bowl. (See, I name things...its weird.)
To recreate this Kitchen Sink Bowl you will need:
2 Grass-Fed Filet Mignon 6oz steaks from the SUNSHINE SHOPPE
Brussels Sprouts, chopped, tossed with oil and salt and pepper and roasted at 375 for 15 minutes
Sweet potatoes, chopped small and tossed with chopped onion, pancetta, fresh chopped rosemary avocado oil, salt and pepper and roasted at 400 for 25 minutes.
Mini Sweet Bell Peppers, sliced and caramelized in skillet
Avocado, sliced
Top it all with a fried egg.
EASY PEASY. Really, this was ready in 30 minutes from start to finish. And you can do any combination of this meal with whatever you have in your kitchen. I usually make this dinner the day before I go to the grocery store because it allows me to clean out my fridge with all the odds and ends that didn't make it into recipes that week.
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